How to Reduce Tension With Your Gamer

Are you tired of fighting with your gamer? Do you feel stressed from the tension in your home? Today we are going to take steps to alleviate that and bring more harmony back between you and your gamer.

One of the easiest ways to reduce tension in your home is by improving your communication style, especially when tensions are high. Consider the following questions:

You may have noticed that when your gamer feels defensive it is followed by aggressive or defiant behaviors such as these:

  • Threats of violence
  • Cursing
  • Destruction of property
  • Protest (school, food, etc)
  • Screaming and shouting
  • Nagging

Calmer communication can help reduce these behaviors.

How do you usually react to conflict with your gamer when they arise?

  • I get defensive and struggle to understand why they can’t see things from my perspective
  • I have a tendency to punish them further, regardless of how they will react (e.g. take away consoles or internet)
  • I get angry at my gamer and end up escalating the situation
  • I react calmly and have a good understanding of why they are getting defensive
  • I don’t have any conflict with my gamer

Which of these suggestions from the video do you think you will benefit from implementing?

  • Stay calm
  • Use I statements instead of You statements
  • Plan out potential responses
  • Avoid mixed messages
  • Validate their feelings
Tip: You can begin improving communication and reducing conflict by identifying one topic you argue about and then planning out and practicing a different, more effective response ahead of time.

Answer the following:

  • The biggest problem I have with my gamer is…
  • When this problem arises again I’m going to…

We hope reflecting on your communication style has been helpful for you. Although it is difficult to completely eliminate tension in your home, the more calmly and consistently you communicate, the less likely you are to have explosive situations.

If at any point you are concerned for your safety or your property please seek the help of a professional or contact your local emergency services provider.

Now that you have learned more about excessive gaming, including the common mistakes to avoid and how to reduce tension, tomorrow we will move forward towards building a plan of action.

If you would like additional support check out our Reclaim parenting program or book a consultation with a professional by emailing [email protected].